Auditing The “First Amendment” Auditors: Auditing America’s Anselmo “Enrique” Morales-Torres Gets His Turn For A TB Audit

The 33-year old Florida has been featured on Turtleboy before, how will he hold up under closer scrutiny?


I have pledged to conduct character and moral “audits” on these so-called “Auditors”. You can read my uncensored thoughts and feelings on Turtleboy by clicking here, or if your little old Christian grandma is really interested in how these losers hold up to some scrunity, you can keep reading below without all the naughty language jeopardizing your immortal soul and giving Me-Maw a heart attack.


Yesterday we took a closer look at “Hot Tow Truck Girl”, AKA Danielle Bognanno, AKA the chick who definitely just ripped off a bunch of strangers for $800+ in “bail money” for the bail her boyfriend doesn’t have. As of now, she refuses to address any of the allegations, hasn’t refunded a dime despite proof positive that Abrams has no bail, but had time to go to some liberal protest with “Auditing America”, where even the protesters didn’t want them around.

You know you’re awful when even a group of full-grown adults who spend their weekday afternoon chanting about a judge upholding law and order don’t want you around.

To paraphrase the whole video:

“These guys are making sure our people don’t get hit by cars, can you leave them alone? They haven’t done anything to you.” – Woman with too much free time

“LOL They’re the only cops around right now we can harass for views on YouTube so my lady friend can buy us more drugs when the stolen donations dry up.” – Anselmo

So today, we have a new contestant. Anselmo Enrique Morales-Torres, step right up!


Anselmo, aka “Enrique” is a familiar face. You may or may not remember him from that time he and fellow “auditor” creepy Joe Hart harassed a domestic violence victim in a police station lobby and then cried like little mewling babies when they were promptly arrested. 

Anselmo made this face:


So we’re off to a rough start for him.


But at least he’s not a career criminal and violent felon like Josh Abrams, right? I mean sure, he’s willingly associating and covering for the woman who took thousands of dollars for bail that doesn’t exist. And sure, was openly associating with Josh Abrams up until right now, when he’s suddenly claiming to not know him in videos,


You lie like a cheap carpet, Anselmo.

But at least he’s not a violent danger to society, right?



Don’t let the effeminate demeanor and Buddy Holly glasses fool you. This guy is bad news.

We already knew that he has a litany of misdemeanor charges related to his “activism” in Rhode Island. But do you know about his time in Florida? I do!

You know, when from 2007-2012 he spent his time on wholesome, noble activities like, felony grand theft,

Kidnapping, domestic violence, and attempted sexual battery,


And false imprisonment with yet another domestic violence charge, because apparently he really likes to pick on women.


How’s your mom, Anselmo? Oh wait….nevermind. You fled Florida to avoid paying restitution. We’re obviously thrilled to have you up here. We were all just sitting around, talking about how we don’t have enough lisping convicted batters accused of light, fun crimes like sexual battery and kidnapping, and then you showed up to fill that void and needlessly harass our police departments because you obviously can’t get over that time they punished you for attempting to rape someone.


Meth: Not even once.


Well, Mr. Morales-Torres, our audit has revealed some major discrepancies between the dedication you purport to have for the First Amendment and civil rights. Mainly because you appear to only respect the freedom of speech up until a dumb ol’ woman refuses to make you a sammich or uses her first amendment right to give you a little sass.  We’ve also found a deficit in your transparency and integrity, as you appear to be covering for Josh Abrams the jailbird and his disappearing girlfriend as they pocket that money and run. Honestly, even if I were Rodney King, I’d feel safer in a room full of New York cops from the 90s alone than I would with you.  For that reason, in my capacity as an official representative of Turtleboy Sports, I must politely yet firmly insist that you put down the camera phone, hitchhike back to Florida, and find a trailer to collect your SSDI checks in quietly. You’re not wanted nor needed here, and you should remember that Northern girls tend to hit you back more often. You don’t fit in here.


Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonetization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the Donation button above if you'd like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy:  Qries


  1. Hey Turtleboy..the one question we all should be asking regarding these accountability losers that you touched on when you did your piece on “i do ya in a tow truck ” Danielle Bognanno is WHERE IS HER KID? She was evicted according to your story. Someone needs to get DCF involved!

  2. To the person who wrote this story on Anselmo: You need to stop putting your bias opinions of a person on the internet for your personal benefit. Several times in what you wrote, you mention personal and unprofessional comments about him as if you have a grudge, as if you know him better than anybody else. I don’t know the guy at all but I can tell you a few things. First of all, he has kids that he cares for as a father. People make mistakes in their past and if you’re a true christian you should understand that people can be forgiven however you seem you are unforgiving and not a true christian, your “Me-Maw” would be quite upset at you if she found out you were out here talking crap about people you don’t know that you’re judging purely on criminal record. The last thing I want to tell you is he is doing first amendment audits for the benefit of the public, for you and your Me-Maw, because police are killing citizens on a constant basis. This year, a black man was killed by a white officer in his own apartment and now she has a criminal record if I were an idiot believing everything you say, I’d believe that innocent black man deserved to be shot. Then not too long after that incident, a black woman was shot by a white officer in her own house. The point I am making is that recently even police have admitted that video taping police is critical, and even the actions of officers have improved due to video taping, but the problem is that even though it is legal police are still incriminating citizens for video taping and that is what he is doing. He is protecting your rights and everyone else because police are not doing their jobs right and they are not respecting our rights, they think they are above the law! Anselmo does not believe he is above the law because he knows it very well (maybe not in his past but he does now very well and so does his lawyer). Let’s say you, a law abiding citizen go for a jog one day and it starts getting dark. A policeman drives by you and thinks you’re suspicious for what ever reason. Suspicion is not a crime but they can turn it into a crime real quick. He says “why are you nervous” you say “I’m not”, he says “do you have drugs on you” you say no, he pats you down illegally anyways and says he smells drugs on you although you don’t have drugs and so he says “put your hands behind your back” and puts you in cuffs and in the back of his cruiser. 5 more police cars show up, your crying and pissing yourself because your rights are being violated. Then they release you once they decide they are done playing games with you. THIS IS WHAT HE IS FIGHTING FOR, EVERYONES RIGHTS. Police can do everything I just said and get away with it all, and a whole lot more. People have spent years in prison for crimes they have not committed but it is your word against a policeman’s word and you know how that goes. It can and will happen to anyone anytime for any or no reason at all, especially if a policeman is not in a good mood that day. Now I have tried to be very professional in my words here unlike you with all your personal nasty comments about this person, I suggest you learn from this and take down this horrible article. All you’re trying to do is go out of your way to make someone look bad and the only purpose I see is to defend bad policing. I hope your rights get abused and you get thrown in jail and end up in his shoes, and someone writes a nasty article about you, Mr. Innocent Christian, and that your Me-Maw disowns you. Good day to you, god be with you.

    1. I agree with with all the other comments. Author is a keyboard bully who I’m sure wouldn’t dare talk to anyone he writes about to their face.

      Dudes name is Aidan Kearny, a pansy looking school teacher who’s only claim to fame is having censorship beef with fb. He’s riding on Alex Jones coattails.

      Hes a small town east coast pussy who gets small time event speaking engagements.

      Someone will take him deep sea fishing soon

    2. You are a loser if you are trying to defend these idiots. Join them for some fun and games. Put your face out there.

    3. You are stupid.He doesn,t do audits for the people. He does them for his financial gain and the pleasure he gets out of harassing others.He is a P.O.S.

  3. Most unprofessional judgmental writer ever. You know nothing about the guy. Don’t forget that Jesus loves all, including sinners. The man has children and is a good father. I believe he is a good man and I forgive him for his past, you should do the same.

  4. El slime-o is a total waste of oxygen. He and his boyfriend Will Turdbite are nothing more than a couple of meth heads deliberately out to harass people for drug money. A good father? Do you really believe this slime ball has kids? He and the other “auditors” and their fans don’t even know what the 1st Amendment says. Even at the beginning of their videos they say they are going inside a building to see if the occupants respect their “rights” and then once inside they claim they are just their to take video of the nice building. How phony is that? They are complete cowards and have a fan base as stupid as they are.

  5. Most of these “Auditors” look like they’re on welfare or don’t make a lot of money working. They have nothing better to do with their lives other than going around bothering people with their cameras. Of course you can record or take pictures in public, but the vast majority of society DOESN’T CARE about the “Auditor’s” videos.

    All these “Auditors” really want to do is try to get as many views as possible in hopes YouTube will pay them. They intentionally try to get into conflicts with people to generate more views. I don’t believe they really care about the First Amendment, as much as getting paid.

  6. What ever your name is you little turd. Go smoke another bowl with your MMC. You are just another piece of vermin like Josh and Bucketboy and the rest. You would be the first little Pu–y Bi-ch to dial 911 when something goes bump in the night. You are a complete narcissist who obviously has issues with women. Tell us, do you have any scars from bucket boys jagged tooth on your? By the way, your voice sounds like a bug. aaanng, aaanng. Dumb MF.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *