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Brave Man Vows To Call The Cops Every Time He Sees A MAGA Hat In Hatfield Because It’s A Terrorist Threat

 

A rather interesting letter to the editor was published in the Hampshire Gazette last week.

It’s true. When I see people in MAGA hats I assume they’re about to detonate suicide bombs. Obviously then this brave patriot was left with no choice but to tie up valuable police resources with very serious phone calls alerting them of people in red hats with white lettering on them. Thank you for your service Matt Levin.

As you can see, he looks exactly as you imagined he would. That right there is the face of every white male over the age of 55 from Amherst to Northampton. It’s basically Vermont. They are required by law to grow white beards, shop exclusively at co-ops, and put “Hate has no home here” signs in their front yards in case someone full of hate attempted to move into their home.

The only thing he hates is deodorant, fun things, and the half of the country that thinks differently than him. I for one am shocked that he’s a Bernie bro. Those are usually the most reasonable and mentally stable members of the democratic party.

Anyway, the terrorists who want lower taxes, enforcement of immigration laws, and don’t blindly believe the mainstream media, have been given a warning – Matt Levin is no longer putting up with your shenanigans. And he encourages others to join him in his quest to report all conservatives to the police as soon as you see one on site.

As good as this letter to the editor was it doesn’t quite add up to last year’s letter, “Ban all guns in public.”

Very reasonable. This about sums up counterculture Chris Kringle’s way of thinking.

If you’re in the Hatfield area try driving around with a MAGA hat on and see if you get questioned by Homeland Security. If you do, then it means Matt Levin’s done his job to keep his country safe from domestic terrorists.

 

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Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonetization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the Donation button above if you'd like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy:  Qries

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