The Turtleboy Live show with Bret and Uncle Turtleboy returns tonight at 9 PM. Click here to subscribe to our channel on our march to 7,000 subs. One of the topics we will no doubt be discussing is the video that Josh Abrams uploaded on Friday (and then quickly pulled down when he realized how badly he screwed up), in which he illegally wiretaps his own probation officer. You can fast forward to the 38:30 mark because all he does before that is ramble on with his usual nonsense and beg for money for his canteen fund.
The best part is that he thinks his probation officer Vanessa Banks is on his side. Josh, she is not your lawyer. She’s basically a cop who is actively looking for a reason to send you back to jail. You gave her that reason by illegally recording her with this lie:
“I’m recording this, just because, for my records.”
No, you’re recording this so you can live stream it on YouTube and make money off of advertisements. You don’t have records. You have words written on your hand in magic marker. You also deleted the video when it turned in a direction you weren’t expecting, so there wouldn’t be any records of this at all had a turtle rider not recorded it.
Josh called her up because people have been accusing him of lying about passing drug tests every day, since not even a degenerate like him would be tested every day. But unfortunately for him it turned into one of the greatest self owns of all time.
Bitch Tits: “Someone told me that I have to get drug tested every day now, and they said I had to pay for it or something like that.”
PO: “Who told you that? Why are you calling daily?”
Bitch Tits: “My number has been coming up every single day.”
PO: “You’re missing the no shows and everything. We call you, so.”
Bitch Tits: “Someone told me I have to pay for these tests.”
PO: “Don’t listen to people on the streets.”
Bitch Tits: “Besides the miss test, because I’m trying to combat some people saying that they have to be paid for and I’m not paying them, I’m failing drug tests. Besides the test that I missed in Chicago and you were notified, during my period of probation which has been for quite some time now, I have no failed any drug tests.”
PO: “Joshua come in, I’m not talking about this on the phone. Come in, I’ll be here Monday.”
Bitch Tits: “Could you confirm just for my records that I have not failed any tests.”
Things that were confirmed from that conversation:
- He lied that he calls them every day – they call him when it’s time to get tested
- He missed a test to go to Chicago
- His probation officer hates him
Things the were not confirmed from that confirmation:
- Josh hasn’t failed a drug test while on probation
How awesome would it be if he goes back to jail for this because he violated his probation by wiretapping his own probation officer? I’ll have a lot more to say about this tonight, so tune in at 9 PM. See ya then.
Please consider supporting local journalism by donating to the Turtle fund:
Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: