Like Turtleboy on Facebook
Poor Behavior

Miami Airport Descends Into Chaos As Brawl Erupts Over Standby Tickets, No Security Or Police Intervene


A viral world star caliber video from Miami International Airport depicting several individuals fighting for over 90 seconds with no police intervention has sparked concern over airport security.

Not sure where these fine folks were heading towards, but I think we can all agree the smart money is on a Spirit flight to Chicago. I just thank the good Lord they were wearing masks. Someone could’ve gotten sick!

A lot of people have been asking where the cops were for that, but they’re forgetting the new rule from black lives matter:

If you see black people fighting and/or stabbing each other, you just have to let them fight it out. It’s part of the cultural experience. I personally disagree with that, but I’m not black so it’s my job to just shut up and listen to BLM elites like Bree Newsome, who have told me that this has been going on for eons, so who am I to disagree?

Others are upset at the blue checkmark who posted it.

It’s a tweet Doctor Becky, not the 6 o’clock news. And it’s newsworthy because you don’t see it every day, because there shouldn’t be gigantic brawls at international airports.

What exactly is the racist narrative here? Oh right, we can only film and share videos of people behaving poorly when they’re white. The narrative is that the biggest problem in the black community are the racist cops who patrol it. Videos like this might lead you to believe that there are more pressing issues that aren’t being addressed.  We’re supposed to pretend like stuff like this doesn’t happen when the parties involved are black because it makes white people like Pronouns Patty here uncomfortable.

Pronouns in bio.

Every. Single. Time.

Imagine seeing a brawl like that and the conclusion you reach is that the bad person is the guy who posted the video of it on Twitter because it’s racist? Meanwhile, she has no problem publicly shaming white people for the crime of drinking alcohol at a restaurant.

There was a lot going on in that video and it was hard to tell who was on whose side, or who was what gender, so let’s break it down.

It began when Underpants Bundy and Skinny Jeans Santana were beating the bag out of White Pants Walter, when out of nowhere came Down Ass Ho-sana to his rescue.

To the surprise of exactly nobody Underpants Bundy had no problem hitting a woman, and she had no problem using her purse as a weapon.

Skinny Jeans Santana was giving up at least 40 pounds to White Pants Walter, but luckily they all just kind of came together in a south side orgy that left White Pants Walter defenseless as he was kicked in the crotch several times. Meanwhile, Underpants Bundy repeatedly punched Down Ass Ho-sana and curbstomped her for good measure.


Meanwhile, on the other side of the terminal a man in blue (who we later figured out was with Down Ass Ho-sana and White Pants Walter) was being tag teamed by two other men wearing black and red.

It was hard to see what was transpiring in that fight as the man in blue and the man in black grappled each other, and the man in red threw the the occasional haymaker which likely accidentally connected with his ally several times.

Some people are upset with the woman with the cell phone who was standing there and taping it all. Not me though. I don’t make the rules anymore – BLM does. By rule white people are required to let this all play out and see who survives. It’s worked this way for eons.

After they finished beating on White Pants Walter and Down Ass Ho-sana, Underpants Bundy and Skinny Jeans Santana picked up their bags and tried to leave.

Unfortunately they walked directly into the other brawl, and as the rules required them to do they had to jump in too. Then out of nowhere White Pants Walter came to get his vengeance.

The tape stops there, but luckily someone else got video of part 2.

As you can see, Underpants Bundy jumped in on the guy in blue because a 2 on 1 advantage wasn’t nearly enough to secure the victory.

And they were all wearing Jordans. Of course.

White Savior Willie attempted to play the role of social worker to show us what would happen if cops stopped responding to calls like this.

The answer was that Underpants Bundy ignored his attempts to de-escalate and reimagine policing, and instead elected to continue to beat the shit out of the guy in blue.

Good job Willie.

As it turns out these gentlemen were indeed trying to get back home to Chicago. We know this because Underpants Bundy, AKA Jameel Decquir of Chicago, was arrested and charged.

Jar Jar Stinks and his friends Deante Jones, Terrell Barnes, and Gewone Ross were trying to board a flight to Chicago. According to the police report the whole thing started after Jameel’s group of 4 was told that there were 3 stand by seats, and one of them would have to take a different flight. They then began attacking the other group for no reason.

The most racist part about this whole encounter was that American Airlines asked them for ID before boarding a flight. Assuming black people have ID is hateful.

Genome Ross was also charged, although it’s unclear which of the assailants was him. He’s a real winner though, and appears that he was headed back to Chicago to finish off his Masters Degree and pursue a career in finance.

It’s not easy being Gewone. Sometimes he can’t figure out what to eat.

He has constant issues with old hoes on unemployment calling him out of the blue to take a ride on his bologna pony.

And his hoes refuse to self-identify as hoes.

And to the surprise of absolutely no one he documents his aspiring rap career while smoking blunts and eating McDonalds.

Remember though, the biggest problem plaguing the black community is racist white police officers. As soon as we get rid of racism the knife fights and murders will stop.


Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 



Related Articles


Ad Free Turtleboy + TBDAILYNEWS

Ad Free Turtleboy

Ad Free Turtleboy
$10.00 / month