The Fairhaven Police are looking to identify the man pictured below, who allegedly stole an elderly lady’s wallet from her shopping cart at the local Walmart. Per their Facebook:
The Hamburgler has really let himself go since getting a taste of that blue magic, huh?
Sweet Honda Element you got there, bro. Your mom let you borrow it to go rob elderly ladies and then treat yourself to a 10 piece McNugget and some fentanyl? Someone has got to know who this winner is, I’m dying to see exactly what kind of human being goes out to rob little old ladies at Walmart. Judging from his gaunt and sallow facial features, I’m sure he’s going to place the blame squarely on the “disease”.
You know, the disease that forces you to go out and rip off someone’s Grandma near the Great Value brand canned peas – that disease. If you know who this chodestuffer is, please slide up into our DMs. He definitely deserves a McShaming.