Unemployed Childless Single Man Who Owns BMW, Doesn’t Work, And Sleeps All Day Is Raising $500 For Weekend Getaway

 

I believe in helping people who are trying to better themselves and need a little boost. But the problem is that there are so many people out there raising money for fraudulent purposes that sometimes it’s hard to distinguish between what is legitimate and what is Internet panhandling. This Facebook fundraiser is clearly the latter.

 

Pro-tip – if you’re trying to get people to donate to your cause, don’t mention the fact that you haven’t worked since 2012, sleep al day, and want to “get away” to an undisclosed location to get away from your life of not working and sleeping all day. Most people reading this likely work all day, and many of them are raising children. As you can imagine, this can be quite time consuming, and many of us would love to just get away for the weekend. Ironically we could afford to do that because we work, we just don’t have the time.

But you? You admittedly do nothing all day, every day. You want working class people to pay for your vacation from permanent vacation, and when we go to your Facebook page we see you doing this.

Maddening.

Let’s break down his pathetic attempt to garner pity and cash donations.

“I am in need of some money to get out of the house and go on a trip.”

I have a crazy idea that might help you get money – obtain employment. Might work.

“I have tried everything.”

No you haven’t. Know how I know? The very next sentence.

“Most days I just sleep all day from migraines from stress.”

You sleep all day. Do you know how much I would pay for a one hour power nap every day?

“I graduated college in 2012 and have not been able to find a stable job.”

It’s the healthiest economy of our lifetime. If you can’t find a job then you’re either not trying, not willing to work, or you’re a complete imbecile. I’m guessing you’re just not willing to actually work, because you’d rather wallow in self pity.

He also appears to be lying about that based on his Facebook bio.

Perhaps instead of leaving those jobs you should’ve stayed at them. Just a thought.

“It has been almost 8 years of suffering and depression and weight gain.”

If you don’t have a job or kids to take care of then there’s no excuse to not be in perfect shape. The rest of us would kill to have the free time you have, and instead of finding work or exercising you’re sitting on the couch eating donuts. Maybe try running at the track instead of posing for glamour shots next time.

“I have applied for 10,000 jobs, gone door to door, face to face, applied online etc.”

No you haven’t.

“I have done everything and can’t get anything.”

No you haven’t.

“Living off stuff that I sell of my own items and possessions.”

Perhaps your financial plan should include something besides a Facebook yard sale of your unwanted crap. And how do you have so many possession to sell if you haven’t worked since 2012? Also, you might want to work on your marketing strategy, and avoid begging people to buy your unwanted goods.

“Help a fiend out.”

Something tells me that wasn’t a typo.

His EBay store is just a bunch of overpriced crap that you can find for cheaper online, and doesn’t come from this guy’s closet.

Nobody is going pay $25 for your used gym shorts. Nor do we want your overpriced soccer crap.

Or your $100 BU jerseys.

Or the BMW that apparently is sitting in what appears to be your driveway of your very nice looking neighborhood.

Yes, that’s right – he owns a BMW, despite not working since 2012.

The only right thing he said was his final sentence.

“This world is a tough place to live in and I am just looking for some support.”

Yea, it is a tough place. At least it is for turtle riders who are working multiple jobs to put food on the table for their families. Life is actually easy for you though. You sit around, do nothing, and somehow find a way to survive.

 

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Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonetization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the Donation button above if you'd like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy:  Qries
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