Canton Cover-Up Part 168: Colin Albert Bridgewater State Poetry Explains How A Football Game Works, Plans For The Future

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Reminder that we’re doing the Live Show Sunday night at 9 PM instead of Saturday because it’s Holden Youth Soccer night at the New England Revolution game, and I’ll be checking out the Gillette Stadium Free Karen Read billboard for the first time. Subscribe to our YouTube channel and help us get to 50K turtle riders by clicking here.
To hold you over with some entertainment until then, here is Colin Albert doing poetry for a class last year at Bridgewater State. It’s everything you dreamed it would be and less.
And that right there is why they kept him hidden this whole time. Imagine this mush for brains having to keep his story straight with REAL police. Find me a bigger meathead than Colin Albert. You can’t. The ONLY things he has to talk about are football and fighting. The entire poem is just him explaining how a football game works. And he couldn’t even read the script right. This is what it takes to get into Bridgewater State. This is where the Albert males all spend the best 7 years of their life.
He also explained why he likes to take online classes because he prefers to work in his pajamas.
There is no way the spawn of Chris Albert could ever graduate with a degree in finance. Finance and Alberts go together like snowmen and Jamaica.
“Happy to see where the road’s gonna take me someday.”
If your entire alibi is this:
Then the road is taking you to Souza-Baranowski, son.
Now enjoy the remix and we will see you tomorrow night at 9. Subscribe to our YouTube channel and help us get to 50K turtle riders by clicking here.

His phone screen shot proves he was not there. I read it in Boston Magazine.
If this isn’t sarcasm I will gladly pay for your vasectomy
if karen reade really ran okeefe over with a car, it doesnt matter where collin was
Time to get your eyes checked
Is that Billy Shakespeare? Holy shit!
How do you get a Bridgewater State Alum off of your porch? Pay for the (mediocre) pizza……hehe
You don’t want to be Drunken and Last because colon will give that azz a blast
This is why a lot of people don’t take you seriously. Cmon man. You’re supposed to be an “award winning journalist”
I was doing well right up to “best 7 years….” That’s when my coffee blew out my mouth, outta my nose…. big mess to clean now.
Thanks, TB.
Like father like son
What a pathetic, low effort, small-minded, attempt at poetry. I see a complete and total lack of creativity…likely an INABILITY to be creative. He essentially just described how a football game works. This like 5th grade level.
TB must be so in the Albert’s heads! He’s got the freshman year dorm room poetry slam footage, and that’s just for Saturday filler…if Chicken Parm had any halr left on his vapid bald head he’d be ripping it out right now yelling, “how the fuck did he get that!”
I fooled the cops
I fooled the D.A.
I can’t do nothing until I’m in my pjs.
We do the Canton salute and can’t stop.
John O’Keefe is dead, but my fake text message will get me off.
Thank you.
Stop recording.
Thank you.
Shakespeare Is gay.
A finance major? I question the ability of his HS counselor for advocating that path. I was a finance major. I’m f’ing brilliant compared to this kid. There is no way this meathead could handle a finance major. No way.
no, but it sounds “cool,” and all kinds of other nitwits are doing it, so…
Maybe TB ought to ask Chicken Parm Charlie if Colin rode the short bus to school when he was little.
Isn’t it obvious! That’s like asking is the sun far away!
Guys, he’s really a good kid. I encourage you all, to please, please, let the legal process play out. Uncle TB included! Thank you citizens. – Your Police Chief
He’s a Good Boy!
A Very Good Boy!
Colin go on TB live. Clear your name.
Boy, you’re so stupid you don’t even realize it.
-Colin thought the quarter-back was a refund.
-Colin went to speak his mind and was speechless.
-Brain eating zombies walk right past Colin.
-Colin sold his car for gas money.
The game begins with a kick
In the showers i look at the dicks
At half time I snort some Coke
The trainer gives my ass a poke
My drunk dad is usually laying around
If it weren’t for violence I’d just be a clown
If we score less points we lose
Chloe was one of the big clues
I lift weights naked in Coach’s garage
Coach gives me a prostate massage
When you throw the ball it’s called a pass
I’m a complete dumb ass
Now that’s creative
LOL ! Nice job! I give you an A for this exercise!
Imagine writing out that tuition check and finding out that’s the return on your investment?
The football is big.
The football is brown.
I come from Canton.
That is my town.
LOL !…You should have added: ‘The football is round’ 🤣
Remind me never to hire a financial advisor who went to bsu
It’s not polite to make fun of retards…..uh the mentality disable!
LOL !
WTF? This is considered College level work? Seriously? I’m more shocked at the abysmally low standards of Bridgewater State College than the idiotic ramblings of pajama clad Colin.
He was a college student making up a rhyme about football for a grade, in a college course, how is this so? I would have never believed this without seeing it.
I stuck a crayon up a ret@rded cats ass, it dragged itself back and forth across an old ouija board and the resulting scrawl of connected letters was a better poem than this.
Souza Baranowski 🤣🤣🤣
Colin albert they dont even know who his pops is there all cuckholds and love watching their wives get shafted by other family members as they sit in the corner drinking bud light limeritas
Your point of view caught my eye and was very interesting. Thanks. I have a question for you.
Your point of view caught my eye and was very interesting. Thanks. I have a question for you.
Certainly. I agree with you.
This rather valuable opinion
And on what we shall stop?
Yes, quite
I can not participate now in discussion – it is very occupied. But I will be released – I will necessarily write that I think.
Я извиняюсь, но, по-моему, Вы допускаете ошибку. Давайте обсудим.