Canton Ratchet Madness 2024 Round 1: Tail Light Region
Canton Ratchet Madness 2024 has finally arrived. Over the next 3-4 weeks we will be deciding who is the most ratchet of the 64 ratchets in the coverup of John O’Keefe’s murder. Turtle riders will be voting in each of the 4 regions for which ratchets should advance in head to head matchups. Here is the 2024 printable bracket (just save/download the image).
We begin in the Tail Light Region. You have 24 hours to vote on which ratchet should advance to the second round.
1. Jennifer McCabe vs. 16. Kellie Lamb
- Jennifer McCabe – Googled “hos long to die in cold” to make sure John O’Keefe was dead then started a support group for his mother
16. Kellie Lamb – Real estate agent/wannabe mean girl forever loyal to Jen McCabe who likes to assault people for filming in public
8. John Connolly vs. 9. Michael Lank
8. John Connolly – Overcooked microwave burrito who likes to call critics “random fucking citizens” and generally opposes all institutional change
9. Michael Lank – Corrupt townie cop and close friend of the Alberts who they call whenever they need to cover up a crime
4. Julie Albert vs. 13. True Crime and Some Wine Lady
4. Julie Albert – Raised her son to be all around douchebag while frequently skipping court dates to avoid creditors
13. True Crime and Some Wine Lady – Attention seeking Tik Tok lady who supported Karen Read but then flipped to other side and went full ratchet when TB wouldn’t go on her show
5. Lunchbox Lally vs 12. Michelle Gallery
5. Lunchbox Lally – Coached John O’Keefe’s killers on what to say in front of state and federal grand jury while spewing non-stop word salad in court
12. Michelle Gallery – Plus sized Jen McCabe groupie who showed off fupa at Turtleboy arraignment while yelling obscenities
3. Ken Mello vs. 14. Jill Harrison-Thomas
3. Ken Mello – Only attorney who agreed to prosecute Turtleboy because he can’t find any work and is hilariously incompetent and frequently gets tongue lashed by judges
14. Jill Harrison-Thomas – McAlbert groupie who once told a 17 year old girl to “get the dick out of your mouth” for testifying truthfully about Colin Albert’s action the night John O’Keefe was killed
6. Sean McCabe vs. 11. Gretchen Voss
6. Sean McCabe – Raging alcoholic McCabe brother who almost got Judge Cannone recused by threatening to bury Turtleboy’s corpse in backyard of Cape Cod summer home
11. Gretchen Voss – Boston Magazine reporter who flipped to McAlbert side after being courted by David Traub with burgers
7. Roast Beef Ronnie vs. 10. Karen Kelly
7. Roast Beef Ronnie – Gets paid by Chris Albert to give middle finger to peaceful protesters while yelling “Fuck you Turtleboy, you’re a bully with a camera”
10. Karen Kelly – Karen Read turned McAlbert supporter who spoke out against out of town influence in Canton Police audit despite not living in town due to multiple evictions
2. Brian Albert vs. 15. Paul McAuliffe
2. Brian Albert – Never came out of house after being alerted about a dead Boston cop on his front lawn
15. Paul McAuliffe – Pretends to be nice guy looking for compromise but really just likes to stare down and intimidate women
Love this Ratchet Madness and being able to vote online. So many ratchets, so many tough choices.
Keeping my fingers crossed that this is the week for Justice for Officer John O’Keefe and Karen Read.
It’s time for Canton to be closer to closure and the only way that can happen is by arresting those responsible for killing Officer John O’Keefe and those responsible for framing Karen Read.
Thank you for your openness to explore various topics! If you have any specific questions or areas of interest you’d like to discuss, feel free to share them. Whether it’s about the latest advancements in technology, recent scientific breakthroughs, thought-provoking literature, or any other subject, I’m here to offer insights and assistance. Just let me know how I can be of help, and I’ll do my best to provide valuable information and engage in meaningful discussions!
Please discuss the latest advancements in technology, recent scientific breakthroughs, thought-provoking literature
I’ll have whatever mind altering drugs your on. That is one strange trip your on mmaaaan.
Guess what?
I guess you made the cut.
Wow! We’ve got some tough choices already in round 1!
This was a big challenge. John Connolly vs Michael Lank. One bites people and the other bites anything edible.
But Lank has a visible neck. Tough call.
I’m looking at a 14 over 3 upset, as impossible as that seems.
For some reason I was allowed to vote twice. Gretchen Voss should be the ratchet queen.
Using her position to attempt to bury another woman is quite vicious. Karma waiting around the corner for her
Some good pairings in the Taillight region. The 8 vs 9 was a tough call with the corrupt selectman against the crooked cop.
that was a hard one
Lots of upsets for me in this bracket . It’s madness!
Well that was fun 😊
How did Adam Lallys barber not make the list?
I didn’t know he had one
How is Berkowitz not in the Tail Light region?
That #1 seed is gonna be hard to take down. She’s quite the thoroughbred no pun intended.
But totally intended…
That nag is NOT a thoroughbred, not by a longshot.
Oh boy!!! Aidan you made my day! Ratchet Madness with Cantonites in the spotlight!
Awesome
Jen Mcabe is going to win every round without one vote against, throughout. I think Aidan should have crowned her unanimous champion, left her out and named the tourney after the Fugly A$$ Walking Stick Skank.
The Commemorative Jen McCabe Sideshow Freakshow Ratchet Tournament.
Hahaha!! Good idea!
Why is she a skank? I don’t know the history there.
Pictures tell half the story, her actions tell the rest.
That was some good clean fun! Can’t wait to play again!
Going to be tough….they’re all assholes. It’s like trying to decide if Jen McCabe is ugly because she has a horse face or because she has a forehead you could land a small plane on.
Jen McCabe is the favorite to win the tournament.
With everything going on I was afraid there wouldn’t be a ratchet madness but looks like it will be the best one.
Wow! This is the tough one… and we’ve only just begunnnn
GREAT JOB UNC!!!!
Roast beef Ronnie looks like a Fitzgerald from canton
That was fun!
That was fun! Btw doc-I love your impressions of people with their boices and attitude! I was literally laughing aloud by myself!🤣
I notice how many started out supporting KR/Tb but after really looking into the issue more carefully decided to go the opposite side. Seems if your opinion is different you are considered an opponent well what ever happened to freedom of speech let alone freedom of thought. I read Liar for Hire Kearney’s rant about HIS right to freedom of speech but clearly this only apples to him. He spews complete BS and sadly so many fall for it not game enough to question him on any of it, if you do you too will end up on such a list as above or worse. Supporters do have my complete sympathy. Still grifting for even more donations, will they ever stop sure will when he has taken all you have then he just moves on to the next….
I have been trying to have a discussion with someone who thinks Karen Read is guilty. Do you not believe the snow plow driver when he said there was no body of Officer O’Keefe on the front lawn when he drove by at 2:00 am? and there was a car parked at 2:30am where they later found the body hours later? How about the lies by Proctor and Brian Albert? The FBI saying Officer O’Keefe was not killed by a motor vehicle especially Karen read’s.
So Pua McAlbert –
I only use duck duck go, not chrome or safari; however I do know that apple iOS writes to sqllitedb any open but unactive searches every 5 minutes. So Ian Hufflepuff, the person who wrote the shitty first cellebrite extract will say definately that two searches happened at 6:23 and 6;24am (cause they did). However no one has asked him, under oath, if hos long search also happened between 2:22 2:27am. The technology tells the truth and has uncovered the corruption.
So p
hos long ?
THERE’S A MAN PASSED OUT IN THE SNOW… i think he is dead [no, you know Officer O’Keefe is dead cause you googled hos long to die in cold three times]
Thank you for your response! I’m grateful for your willingness to engage in discussions. If there’s anything specific you’d like to explore or if you have any questions, please feel free to share them. Whether it’s about emerging trends in technology, recent breakthroughs in science, intriguing literary analyses, or any other topic, I’m here to assist you. Just let me know how I can be of help, and I’ll do my best to provide valuable insights and information!
Thank you for your response! I’m grateful for your willingness to engage in discussions. If there’s anything specific you’d like to explore or if you have any questions, please feel free to share them. Whether it’s about emerging trends in technology, recent breakthroughs in science, intriguing literary analyses, or any other topic, I’m here to assist you. Just let me know how I can be of help, and I’ll do my best to provide valuable insights and information!
Can someone tell me how lally got the name lunchbox I’ve been asking this for almost a year.
Cause it rhymes?
Personally, I prefer Lallyspaining or
Adam I’ll be brief
I have personally met roast beef Ronnie and can confirm he is a total a hole. If d&e doesn’t get shut down he will be working there for life.
Bukkake is pullin for Roast Beef Ronnie
to be the Cinderella story
of this whole tournament
I can see any one of the top 8 seeds winning it! Can we have co champions.
There’s two Roast Beef Ronnie’s in the next round, instead of Brian Albert in one of those spots.
Menemen eskort ,
Hello, you’ve done a fantastic job. I’m sure my friends will find it helpful, so I’ll check it out and tell them about it.