In the most Lawrence thing you’ll see all week a bunch of ratchet ho’s had beef with another ratchet whose mother made the mistake of getting involved before being dog walked, dragged, and badly beaten by an army of soon to be teen moms. And it all took place right outside the high school after the school day ended.
Only in Lawrence does parent pickup end with matching bloody faces for mother and daughter.
It wouldn’t be a fight in Lawrence if it didn’t end next to a confused woman in pajama pants holding a cane.
It starts off with mother and daughter getting dog walked separately, with Mom in the foreground and daughter in the background getting tossed around by the Turquoise Tunastank. Poor Mom didn’t stand a chance as she was getting held in place with her hair by Hurricane Goya while the other kicked her in the head while wearing her Sunday Jordans.
You know they did something bad if they’re willing to get their Sunday Jordans dirty.
After recovering from her pummeling the daughter decided that she didn’t get the shit kicked out of her enough so she decided to challenge the girls who were finally done working her Mom. The ratchet who usually wins these fights is which ever one grabs a clump of hair first and gives their opponent the hoodrat helicopter.
You do not want to find yourself in the position of being adjacent to a section 8 stoop while looking up at some girl who calls her teachers “yo mistah,” because you are almost definitely about to get a mouth full of Jordans purchased with food stamps.
The daughter of the vanquished, who goes by Skyla, made a post fight video admitting defeat but vowing to come back 10 times harder on her dead grandfather’s grave, which is especially tragic since the average grandfather in Lawrence is only 39 years old.
She’ll definitely be getting her vengeance, right after she fills out her college applications.
Oh, and someone vowed to shoot up the school on Snapchat on behalf of the mother who was beaten.
So that’s good.
There was another girl fight in school too, featuring copious amounts of hairpulling and haymakers, that was probably over something really important like who called dibs on breeding rights with Diego the friendly local neighborhood fentanyl dealer.
As soon as she was able to toss her by her hair it was a wrap.
Remember though, according to black lives matter it’s racist to have cops in school. We don’t need them at all because of the “school to prison pipeline.” Heavens forbid 17 year olds who commit crimes in school be arrested for doing so. Schools should be magical places where law and order ceases to exist, much like anything Rachael Rollins is in charge of.
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