This is Austin “Ozzy” Simone from Boston.
If Axe Body Spray had a face.
Back Bay Brian Laundrie here claims to be an actor, and even has an IMDb page in which he lists his extensive resume in such movies as Love, Weddings, And Other Disasters, Bjorn, and most recently in Free Guy. You may recognize him as the starring role of security guard #4, but you’d think he’s Ryan Reynolds co-star from the looks of some of his posts.
“I’ve been in plenty of movies.”
Dude, you sell fish.
In case that didn’t make you wet enough, he’s also a world famous model for something called Maggie Agency, where he gets to turn himself on by prancing around in his underpants, attempting to make capris and loafers masculine, and sipping red wine while wearing flannel in a vain attempt to look cultured.
He got married this summer to a beautiful woman named Sophia, and is one of those guys who loves to post pictures of her on Facebook to let everyone know that he has a hot wife.
Sometimes he’ll ask strangers to walk behind him on Newbury Street and take pictures while he’s dressed as an extra in his upcoming movie – Robin Hoodrat Men In Tights.
He has a tendency to engage in bro talk with his old man on Facebook, bragging about how great life is going for him while referring to his girlfriend at the time as his trophy.
Strong “O’Doyle Rules” vibes coming from these two.
Believe it or not his most recent look is actually a step up from his previous look as Fabio Bill Shaner.
But as it turns out he’s not the nice guy and loving husband he pretends to on social media, and he looks like the love child of Brian Laundrie and Chris Watts for a reason. We know this because his wife recently posted a blog filled with pictures of her swollen face, allegations of abuse, and text messages of him admitting to doing it.
She claims that he hit her multiple times after she caught him texting other women, sending her to the ER. She also alleges that he hurt their dog, and spent his dead mother’s insurance money on a fancy ring and a new Jeep. There is a court date on the 22nd according to the blog post, and she wants to get a permanent order and for him to go to jail.
The texts purportedly from him are typical of a domestic abuser – begging for forgiveness, saying he loves her, and using his dead mother as a crutch. He then turned it on her and blamed her for being more concerned about social media because she removed their wedding pictures.
Meanwhile his entire existence appears to be social media.
She accused him of using her as arm candy for social media while abusing her when no one was looking.
And apparently his friends have been reaching out to her, trying to make excuses for him.
This is why you can never trust anyone who flaunts about how awesome their life is on social media. Happy, well-adjusted, down to earth people don’t do that.
Austin Simone appears to have lots of friends and can obviously attract good looking women. Lets hope the next time a woman thinks about dating him and searches his name they find this blog. I’m sure it wasn’t easy for his wife to come forward like this, but she did the right thing and probably saved another woman from the same fate in the future. People who beat women and dogs have something wrong with their brain. They’re used to saying “sorry, I love you,” and then doing it all over again. The only way they’ll learn is to blow up their spot like this and take legal action.
Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonetization. If you like what we do and want to support free speech feel free to hit the donation button. Or just buy this award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: