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Law and Order

Worcester Woman Proposes Shutting Down Massachusetts Borders After Seeing Too Many Out Of State License Plates At Dollar Store


Megan Newman is a Worcester resident, cosplay enthusiast, and resident Bat Girl.

And in order to keep Worcester safe from the commie cold she has a proposition.

Shut the state off from the rest of the world. Seems like a perfectly sane thing to do. Looks like we’re finally going to get that wall after all. Except instead of keeping out Mexicans it will keep the free loading Vermont hippies back where they belong.

Couldn’t all those out of state plates be rental cars?

Nope. She knows a rental when she sees one.

According to her no one is allowed to leave their states at all.

Not so sure about that Cosplay Karen, but I trust you.

What about the fact that states that have opened up have a fraction of the cases, hospitalizations, and deaths from COVID?

This is what your brain looks like on CNN.

For anyone who thinks they’re smarter than her, just understand that you’ll never be able to compete with her list of accomplishments, which includes jobs in retail and other jobs in retail.

Life goals accomplished. Suck on that all you morons who decided to procreate.

When she’s not busy policing Worcester for out of state license plates Bat Girl spends her days suing companies.

Just as soon as she finds out what the AG’s office is.

She might not have any kids yet, but she does have a pet ferret who calls her Mommy.

Which is completely normal.

One of her animals apparently got poisoned, so she’s got another class action lawsuit going against Marshall’s and/or Petco.

Despite being a Batman diehard she won’t watch any of their movies because of feminism or movie theater shootings, or something.

She’s been a Karen long before commie cold came around though. Take for instance her crusade last summer to have people call the cops on trucks and buses using public roads.

She’s also got some Failure Swift in her, as she once tried and failed to get on America’s Got Talent.

And just like Failure Swift she enjoys publicly crapping on her husband Bat Boyardee for not making her coffee and waking her up before going to work.

No wonder she can’t wake up with tall these “convoys” going down her street at 3 AM.

Let’s see what this convoy sounded like.

She’s filing a lawsuit against the City of Worcester over what appears to be a street sweeper for cleaning the streets at night instead of during the day when there’s traffic and cars on the road. Attorney Richard N. Vulva is on the case.

Cosplay Karen really is Failure Swift 2.0. And I’d love to get her on the Live Show tonight. Hit me up Megan.


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