Canton Cover-Up Part 286: Dear Jennifer McCabe

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Dear Jennifer,

I haven’t had time to reach out to you since the stay away orders were lifted by Judge Krupp, so I apologize for neglecting you. I moved to your county for the last 42 days, and have been busy keeping the award-winning journalism coming, while living as a guest of the state. But I promise, I haven’t forgotten about you, and I know that we will be seeing plenty of each other moving forward.

I feel like we got off on the wrong foot. When I first heard about your 2:27 am Google search, I tried to put myself in your shoes. How far would I go to protect a loved one from life in prison? I thought that it was a heinous thing to do, but I somewhat understood why you took whatever steps necessary to protect your family.

But then I started hearing from people in Canton that you were walking around town like you did nothing wrong, always with a group of other soccer moms who somehow weren’t ashamed to socialize with you in public. I’ve got to be honest – that rubbed me the wrong way and I lost any empathy I had for you. It wasn’t just the fact that you helped murder a man you considered a friend. It was the fact you were so arrogant about getting away with it that really chapped my ass.

Back to the night of January 29, 2022 – I have some questions. Did you lure John there to have him beaten? Why were you so insistent that he come to the house? When he began fighting, and someone hit him in the back of the head, did any part of you contemplate calling 911? Within minutes you were calling and texting him, suggesting that you immediately went into coverup mode. Were you being ordered to do so by Brian Albert? Were you scared? Were you crying? Was Sarah Levinson and Julie Nagel aware of what happened? Were they crying? What did you do to calm them down? Did you notice Ryan Nagel outside and direct Julie to tell him to go home? Did you guys talk about the murder on the way home or just make small talk? Did you plan on framing Karen Read or did you just kind of wing it after seeing her broken taillight?

I just have so many questions that I’d like you to answer. I mean you no harm. I’m just a really curious person by nature. So while I have your attention, let me ask you some more questions:

  • Why were you awake at 4:53 am when Karen called after a night of drinking?
  • Why didn’t you go to bed?
  • Was Matt involved in beating John? And was he as calm as you were?
  • When you are alone in your house, does Matt have a tendency to stare out the window at traffic? Or does he only do that at parties?
  • Why did you tell Karen to come to your house at 5:00 am, only to drive her back to John’s house and jump in with Kerry who lives close to you? Was this a delay tactic, hoping John would die in the cold?
  • How dumb did you feel the moment you searched for “Hos long to die in cold?” and realized what a mistake it was?
  • Did you think the search for the same thing at 6:24 am would make the 2:27 am search disappear?
  • Why did you voluntarily hand your phone to the DA’s office? Did you think that Karen Read would never find your deleted calls and searches?
  • Why didn’t you tell the 911 dispatcher that you were at your sister’s house?
  • Why did you call John a “man lying in the snow”?
  • What did you whisper to Nicole when you called her at 6:07 am, and did she say anything back?
  • Do you and Matt ever laugh at how stupid Kerry Roberts is? And how lucky you were, that someone as dumb as her, was with you when Karen found John’s body?
  • Do you feel gross forming “Peggy’s Angels”, taking John’s mom and niece out to dinner, and remaining close to them so that they won’t suspect you helped murder him?
  • When you and Matt get dressed for court, do you guys laugh when you put on the Justice for JJ buttons? Do you convince yourself you didn’t kill him to feel less dirty? Or are you just a sociopath?

Anyway, you’re a tremendous actress, I’ll give you that. If I ever kill someone, you’ll be the first person I call to “fix it.” The rubbing of the shoulders in court, the fake tears you put on, and the fake smile you put on when you go out every day and pretend you’re a suburban soccer mom who would never kill a man like John. Few could pull this off like you did. Brian and Nicole got the hell out of dodge the moment their names came up. But not Horseface. She has no fucks to give and was going to go on pretending like nothing happened.

I feel like things started going bad for us when I tried becoming friends with you. I realize I was a little forward, but I was so sad and disappointed that you ran to Stoughton District Court and told Judge Walsh you were “fearing” me over that. I thought you liked me because you were smiling at me while I was asking you questions, outside of court. Guess not! Sorry you didn’t get the order because of that pesky First Amendment.


It was nice seeing you in Billerica though. I’m a big high school lacrosse fan, and was so happy to see my new friend there. It sucks that Matt and those other guys got in the way. Because I really wanted to hang out and talk about all the murders you did.



I didn’t see you again until October 11, at my arraignment. What a treat that must have been for you! I noticed you were staring at me, looking BIG MAD while I stood there like a boss, wearing a Free Karen Read sweatshirt and thinking about all the money I was going to make off this. It must have felt so good thinking you had finally silenced me. I’m sorry it didn’t work out the way you planned.

And boy, you sure do take a lot of vacations! I see pictures of you there all the time. At Ogunquit Beach, you look like you could have won the Miss Irish Potato Famine Swimsuit Competition! I’m glad all that murdering hasn’t stopped you from going out in public. Don’t worry, hardly anyone recognizes you and you should continue to enjoy your few remaining days of freedom, acting like none of this happened.



Let me tell you, that Josh Levy sure does have a stick up his ass, doesn’t he? What’s his problem? Why can’t he be cool like Brian Tully and just do what you tell him to do? Doesn’t he know that you were voted Best Looking in the 1994 Canton High School yearbook?

Things are looking up for you though. Sure, everyone knows that you helped kill a man, but at least someone nicknamed Krusty Panties has your back. I know that you wouldn’t normally socialize with someone who lives in squalor and lost two of her kids to the state. But you have to take what you can get. In fairness, you might be a worse mother than she is. At least she didn’t implicate her daughter in a murder by making her be Colin’s getaway driver.

Lindsey Gaetani told me Krusty was at your Christmas party and that you guys went out to lunch after her arraignment in Stoughton on December 12. Did you pick out her Robin Hood costume she was wearing that day?



Lindsey also told me that Krusty put her on the phone with you, and that you told her, “If you’re really sorry for supporting Karen and Turtleboy,” she would tell Tully everything about me and Karen. She told me she was really turned off by the way you spoke to her, but I don’t blame you for not trusting her. Offering to babysit for her for free, and raising money for two lawyers on January 8, was a good way to buy off her loyalty. Grace the Babysitter heard you and Krusty on speakerphone, talking with Lindsey after she called you on December 26, and said she wanted to recant, but that you talked her out of it. Do you think putting me in jail for 60 days is going to stop the Feds from arresting you? Let’s see how that one plays out.

Oh, and how pissed are you at Krusty for posting the 911 call? But I guess you had no choice but to keep playing nice with her because you don’t know how to make YouTube videos on your own.

Anyway, things sure seem to be heating up with the Feds. Hopefully there isn’t dash-cam footage of you turning your back to John’s body as he’s wheeled into an ambulance. That would be a bad look. Don’t worry though, when they arrest you for what you did, you can just say the Google search never happened. It worked with Kevin from Yellow Cottage Tales, and he’s way smarter than the FBI. Or Kevin Reddington can finally show us the lie detector test you passed in April. That might save you.

Either way, I hope you enjoy your freedom while you have it. I will be out soon and you can finally see what life is like behind bars. Don’t worry, you’ll look as good in orange as you do in that one-piece. If you need a prison consultant, give me a call. Hope you like prison lunch and morning rec as much as I do.

Bye girl!

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