Vote For Who Should Advance To The Elite 8 Of The Kylie Kirkpatrick Bracket Of Ratchet Madness 2020


Voting in the Hadassah Bracket is completed and we now know which two ratchets will square off for a spot in the Final Four:

This continues to be the most wide open of the four brackets. Can the Tinder Tunaflap’s Cinderella story continue next week? Or has she finally met her ratchet match. We will see.

Time to move onto the Kylie Kirkpatrick Bracket. You have 24 hours to vote for which ratchets should advance to the Elite 8. In each matchup we provide you with a ratchet resume along with links to previous blogs so that you can make an informed decision.



1. Kylie Kirkpatrick vs. 12. Jared the Jet Ski Junkie

1. Kylie Kirkpatrick

  • Coached 9 year old son to lie about using allowance to pay off classmates’ school lunch debt so that she could fly across the country like a celebrity and raise thousands of dollars in donations from people
  • Isn’t allowed near her son’s former elementary school after turning a nationwide mob on them, and then threatening parents waiting outside for their children
  • Actively solicited donations while pretending to be a non-profit
  • Took in donations from Nike that she immediately sold online
  • Conceived her son in a brook closet with her counselor in drug rehab
  • Abandoned her daughter to be raised by her parents
  • Went to jail after cashing several checks worth over $10,000 belonging to roommate
  • Had to change son’s last name, presumably because she ran up bad credit using his social security number
  • Lied about her son’s deadbeat Dad dying from ALS in order to get free tickets to an Athletics game
  • Has sued over 20 people and lost every time
  • Viciously attacked the deaf community and sued a deaf woman who started a petition about her job as an ASL instructor due to the fact that she is not trained to do so
  • Is a recovering junkie
  • Silenced and terrorized members of the community who attempted to post factual information about her by threatening them at work and harassing their employers
  • Was investigated by the Napa Police and charged with 8 felonies
  • Created a Twitter account in her son’s name that she used to pretend to be her son and heap praise upon herself for being a single mom
  • Repeatedly sought out the media, celebrities, and politicians using social media in order to get things like free Super Bowl tickets



12. Jared the Jet Ski Junkie

  • Attempted to impress a girl at a lake in Plymouth by taking her out on a jet ski and doing tricks, despite her asking him several times to go back to the shore
  • Ended up crashing into another jet ski and abandoned her in the middle of the lake unconscious
  • Went on Facebook and blamed her, falsely claiming that she was driving and denied leaving her there, and said that he was the victim because he needed reconstructive surgery
  • Went on WBZ News and claimed he saved the victim’s life
  • Is a junkie who was previously arrested for selling Viagra
  • Often wears flat brimmed Chicago Bulls hats and has the motto “I f*** s*** up” at the top of his Facebook bio
  • Ended up getting arrested four months later after it was revealed that he was high and he abandoned the victim





2. Josh Abrams vs. 6. Pawtucket Murder Couple

2. Josh Abrams

  • Unemployed man who lives with his elderly parents in Stoneham and makes money on YouTube harassing and filming police officers, DTA workers, RMV employees, and other gainfully employed individuals
  • Arrested at the straight pride parade for harassing the police and refusing to disperse
  • Was the only person at the parade who was rejected by the police, straight pride participants, and Antifa
  • Was held without bail due to pending unarmed robbery charge in Woburn Superior Court
  • While in jail was beaten up by Billy Tibbetts
  • Later read the incident report on a live stream, claiming that he beat up Tibbetts, while specifically adding language that was’t in the report
  • Set up a former coworker to be jumped and kidnapped after being disciplined at work
  • Intimidated the victim in that case in full view of the police
  • Abused a woman while pregnant with his child who he has since abandoned
  • Assaulted the mother of his child and kidnapped the crotch fruit
  • Told police he would not abide by restraining order
  • Parked in a handicapped spot days after auditing the Brockton Police for using a handicapped spot
  • Sold out friend and auditor Joe Orga at the Worcester Police Station, allowing him to be arrested while Josh walked away and followed police orders
  • Testified in front of the Worcester City Council about police corruption, plugged his YouTube channel, no one had any idea what he was talking about
  • Illegally wire tapped his probation officer who would not confirm on tape that Josh had passed a drug test
  • Was arrested by police in Seekonk for attempting to rape his ex-gf in a motel because she would not have sex with him after he forced her to have sex with a man named Julio in front of him for money



6. Pawtucket Murder Couple

  • Shot and killed a woman
  • Repeatedly posted pictures of guns and threats to murder people on Facebook, using the name Gothshooter Santana
  • Despite just turning 18 she agreed to marry him and get a target tattooed on her face
  • Literally killed a woman the day after getting married





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