Everyone knows that Meth Mile is a government sanctioned hellhole where the City of Boston allows junkies to kill themselves by legally buying, selling, and using drugs without any pushback. They even gave them cages to stay in so they didn’t spread coronavirus.
Sure, fentanyl will kill all of them within a year or two, but at least the vaccine they were coerced into getting with a free meal from Arby’s will make sure they only get a mild cold.
Michelle Wu isn’t doing anything to fix it, but at least one man is. Meet “Dr. Jaymz.”
He’s an evangelist preacher, doctor, pop star, podcaster, and exorcist from Britain.
My man travels the world and converts enthusiastic crowds of Muslim women in places like Pakistan.
He might not look like a doctor, but the fact of the matter is that he literally heals crippled men (who can already stand for some reason).
All he has to do is just pray for their knees….
And then – BOOM!
He can walk. Meanwhile the poor guy in the wheelchair is just looking on wondering why Jesus hates him so much.
I’d also like to see your doctor pull demons outside of a possessed Laotian woman.
Look at that wild beast.
The devil thought he could get away with using her as a host, but he wasn’t counting on Reverend Guido Libido stopping by.
But now he’s taken his talents to Boston where he recently cast the demons out of a room full of men, women, and children, simply by grabbing their heads, yelling “FIRE” 3 times, and watching as they collapse into the arms of a Holiday Inn Express employee.
I haven’t seen that many lifeless bodies on a Boston floor since Mike Giannetti started dating again.
Reverend Guido Libido arrived in Boston just in time, because he’s figured out a solution to heroin and fentanyl addiction that no one has thought of yet – fixing it with Jesus. One of his sponsored posts came across the Facebook newsfeed yesterday.
Thank goodness he blurred their faces out.
So how does he get 10 junkies (or 20 depending on the post) to trade in crack for Christ? Through the power of EDM of course. Here’s hit single “All To You,” about a guy whose wife is walking out on him because he can’t pay the bills, so he goes dancing through the streets and shows some vagrants how to dance and accept Christ in their hearts at the same time, and then – BOOM – wife is back.
She was a whore anyway.
Here’s his smash hit Tidal Wave, where a bunch of his high priests throw heroin off a bridge and engage in spontaneous disco.
I’d rather be addicted to fentanyl than ever have to hear that song again.
Any experienced doctor/exorcist/pop star/preacher knows to bring a team of backup dancers with them to Boston so they can occupy city streets to promote getting clean via the power of house music.
I have so many questions about the people in these videos and would love to speak to any of them.
Mainly I’d like to know how many of Reverend Guido Libido’s Jesus Juices did they have to drink before ending up as a backup dancer in one of his junkie conversion music videos.
Likewise I’d like to know who these fallopian french fries in his cover photo are, and which canister they were brought to this country in.
I’m quite positive Reverend Guido Libido has some sort of scam going on here, because….obviously. I mean, how does he pay his Porsche bills on a street pastor’s salary?
I can’t quite figure out what it is yet, but there’s gotta be some sort of money making opportunity I’m missing out on here. Converting junkies isn’t the way because they’re all broke and useless, so maybe he’s selling it and giving them free testers if they let him use them for promotional videos. Just a theory. Either way, I’m getting a lot of strong cult vibes going on here. It reminds me of these guys.
The Church of End Times did the whole exorcism through Christ thing too, and they always had a haram of emotionally disturbed dimes with Daddy issues around them. But they made their fortune as gypsy driveway contractors who pretended to know what they were doing but just showed up with 19 year old Woonsocket runaways with deviled eggs on their chests.
Anyway, if the Reverend would like to come on the Live Show tomorrow night, or if you can get me in touch with any of the backup dancers, feel free to reach out to me at [email protected], or message Clarence Woods Emerson on Facebook.